Avoiding The Breakdown

The weekend was fantastic--drinking and music and Whataburger at 2:30 a.m. on Friday, then artfully slacking on Saturday and Sunday.

So far this week, however, I've been swamped with budgeted work, special pub stories and a last-minute story that got put onto my plate. I've spent so much time on the phone with people that my left eardrum is driving my crazy. I've reached the point where just hearing any voice on the phone in that ear is enough to make me want to tear my hair out. Every time you talk to someone on the phone, there's that slight tinny quality that comes with being blasted through the airwaves, and that tinny feeling vibrates my ear the wrong way and sends the same feeling up my spine that I get from nails on chalkboards.

Yesterday I was extremely busy (why are all these people calling me back? I have an error rate that I work with that's fairly high, so I only expect a percentage of my calls to come through, and when they all call back I'm fucked), and was really excited to get out of work. I bolted as soon as I could, went on a run (good one, hurrah!) and then had an excellent ride with Topper. He didn't try to kill me, didn't even spook once, and I've taken back my title of horse whisperer.

Then I went home and wrote two stories. It made me feel incredibly productive, and I knew my Wednesday would be less stressed because of that, and I got up this morning expecting to feel better. However, I found out my cell phone service had been cancelled because of a past due bill.

Ok, so I should be ashamed that I didn't pay the bill on time or whatever. But I'm not. Using the phone is just something I take for granted and then forget about it. Frankly, I'm more worried about forgetting to pay a student loan bill or rent than I am my cell phone. That's why I have a phone at work too, right? (Kidding. Kind of.) But they slapped on some rather large late fees, and I ended up paying it all off and wiping out all the money I'd been trying to save to the trip to San Francisco at the end of this month for Liz and Pat's wedding. I've already paid for my airline ticket, and still have a small amount that will pay for part of the hotel room, but now I've decided I don't really need to eat in San Franciso.

People aren't calling me back for my last-minute story and I had an interview with a bitchy person that put me in a dour mood. I called Dan (the good thing is my service was back on within about an hour of paying it) and told him I may or may not have a nervous breakdown today. Then I told my editor the same thing, and we decided that getting ice cream would keep us from coming unglued.

The good news is I can see this BS will end soon. The bad news is I'm also not totally sure I should be spending $5 on ice cream.